October 2009
2 posts
2 tags
September 2009
33 posts
Sunday Night Whore, Monday Night Redneck
I can’t decide which opening number is worse: Sunday Night Football or Monday Night Football. SNF has the gorgeous, sexily dressed Faith Hill singing a terrible song about football. MNF has an old redneck in bad clothes singing a terrible song about football. That would seem to favor SNF by default, but… Faith Hill? Football? Someone clue me in to NBC’s thought process here. In...
Say Wha?
Football Night in America pregame interview… Bob Costas asks Eli Manning if he’s interested to see the new Cowboys Stadium. Eli responds “Yeah I’m introduced to see the new stadium.”
Mushmouth or moron? Or both?
My Shit List.
DeAngelo Hall is getting on it pretty quick. D-Hall, lemme ask you something. You remember how to tackle, right?
Alright, look.
The name is “Burress”. As you can clearly see, the second letter in the name is a U. There is not any situation in this language where a U makes an A sound.
The guy caught a fucking Super Bowl winning td. You know who he is. So please, motherfuckers. Stop saying “Barress”. That’s not his name. I know he shot himself in the leg with a gun that was loaded and stuffed...
Huh
Tony Dungy is the only NFL player since the AFL-NFL merger to intercept a pass and throw an interception in the same game. Dungy was the emergency quarterback for the Pittsburgh Steelers in a 1977 game against the Houston Oilers when both Terry Bradshaw and Mike Kruczek went down with injuries on October 30, 1977.[8] He played safety on defense.
Classy, 'til the end
Quick: What do you do when an opposing player scores his second touchdown of the day? Well, if you’re a Texans fan …
FUCK BASEBALL DIAMONDS ON FOOTBALL FIELDS.
THAT IS ALL.
AFL Throwback Unis: The Refs
These are awfully creepy. They all look like child molesters.
“Ladies and gentlemen, I am required by law to inform you that I am a sex offender and your children should not be within 300 feet of me.”
His Last Night on Earth
Might as well just say R.I.P. to Leodis McKelvin now because I don’t think he’s going to make it off the team bus alive.
Here’s a screencap of his wiki from after the terrible loss (your fault, motherfucker!) to the insufferable Patriots.
(click for fullsize)
The textbox near the top says “Fumble during Monday night football to lose game. All he had to do was go...
Observations: BUF @ NE, wk 1
7:55 - Smeared the Mayo? (booooo) Jerod Mayo questionable to return.
7:48 - Dick Jauron looks like a vampire sith lord, and is somehow making the Bills look like a better team than the Patriots.
7:46 - I think Tom Brady must be eating fried chicken dipped in Vaseline for there to be so many Patriots drops already.
The Fog Bowl
So I was reading about this game the other day. The Fog Bowl was a divisional playoff game between the Eagles and Bears at Soldier Field on December 31, 1988.
During the second quarter, dense fog rolled in and the visibility was cut down to less than 20 yards for the rest of the game. Despite this, Randall Cunningham had 407 passing yards for the Eagles. 247 of those yards were split between...
Jay Cutler
(via http://smellslikemascot.blogspot.com/)
People keep saying Chicago finally has a franchise qb. I just want to know… by what virtue is this crybaby a franchise quarterback?
I guess it will depend on whether he has Ed Hochuli helping him out or not.
2 tags
Is he drunk or am I deaf
I keep hearing Daryl Johnston call people by slightly wrong names. I swear he just called Jason Witten “Jason Whitman” and Ronde Barner “Grande Barber.”
Speaking of Goose...
His disembodied color commentary from the sideline is great. I think the the Kenny-Moose-Goose team is the only one that does that. It’s also refreshing to have a sideline reporter who can do something other than bother coaches and players for who-gives-a-shit 20 second long interviews.
Tony Siragusa, DAL @ TB
Ronde likes those low balls. He can go and play with ‘em.
It's week 1 and I'm already sick of
Adrian Peterson commercials. Especially the shirtless one with his tits sloshing around.
John Gruden, MIN @ HOU preseason
I dream of guys like Percy Harvin.
I was Like Um
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Ron Jaworksi, Eagles vs. Cowboys
Get good penetration and grab him around the ankles.
Merrill Hoge, Eagles vs. Cowboys pregame
Press the hole. Press it! Fill it!
10 tags
Ron Jaworski, Packers vs. Vikings
He did a great job there of anticipating the opening, and then stuck it in.
You know what I love? Young quarterbacks.
It’s all about penetration!
They love to press man to man.
Sometimes you may not focus on getting up when you’ve got that big fella in front of you.
Tom Jackson, Packers vs. Vikings pregame
That thing that I wanted him to be able to do, it has to be tonight.
Keyshawn Johnson, Packers vs. Vikings pregame
You’ll continue to see him grow in that position.
John Madden, Colts vs. Bears
Alex Brown just came on the backside of Peyton Manning. I think Peyton felt a little pressure from the inside.